FINALLY!

omg.

i know it has been SO LONG since i last posted, but i was feeling superstitious about writing on the blog about son #2's autism stuff and not hearing about if he was determined disabled and able to get on the waitlist for funding for intensive in-home therapy... sorry for that sentence.  anyhoo, we got word (5 months later!) that he was indeed determined disabled and now we can start that process to hop on that waiting list!

yes, the waiting list is like a little over a year long, but at least we will be on it.

PHEW.

i know son #2 will benefit greatly from intensive in-home therapy. even though he has been making lots of progress, i still think it will be really helpful :)  he has made a lot of changes in the last 5 months! he is high-fiving, responding to his name a little more, singing songs, making more eye contact, imitating more, and just doing normal 2 year old things like getting mad and upset and caring about things :-)

it was very exciting for son #1 to start school again last week. he has also been making a lot of progress with his speech and understanding; he is like turning into a little man or something! crazy.

:)

i didn't forget...

it has been a little bit! but i didn't forget about this :)  it's the usual: start something, get really into it, stop for a night, stop for another night, then another, then remind yourself you should really do it that night, but then you read the whole second book of The Hunger Games trilogy instead, then become obsessed with that, buy the third book, start reading that, and then remind yourself that you should really write tonight, and then write part of it during nap time the next day and finish it that night.  hehehehehe :)  that was a long and terrible run-on sentence!  but sometimes, it just has to happen.

anyhoo, things are going pretty well with the boys lately. son #1 is in that "i want to do everything by myself" phase; even though everything takes like a hour to do so. and he yells, "no, mommy!" every time i try to help or start helping (it is just like a reflex or something).  so, i have been good and letting him do everything by himself and asking him to do things and he is so proud of himself :)  it is pretty darn cute.  lots of high fives and fist pumping and all that.  him and son #2 are starting to play better together too, which is really fun to watch.  but son #2 still has a difficult time engaging and has been really into making REALLY long trains of things these days...  son #1 always says, "good job!" to him after he makes one, but i am not sure if this is an okay thing to let him do or not... do i allow him to line things up and then move them like a train? is that appropriate play? or is that repetitive and not appropriate? he will say "choo choo" and "chug chug chug," so i think it is kind of appropriate play...

son #2 and i have also been making some good progress with the ABA therapy.  we are getting more into it each week and it seems to be getting easier for me to do as well :)  we still have not heard from his speech and occupational therapists from the birth to three program, but hopefully we will hear from them about more therapy soon.

the nap schedule has been broken a few times, but in general it is still working! yay!  the only problem is that son #2 is doing that "refusing to take a nap" thing lately... so that is kind of not cool.  but whatev.  let's hope it is just a phase for a week or two and then we can get back down to awesome napping.

you know, all this talk about autism this month, my son getting diagnosed, all the new findings about genetic and environmental factors, gets me thinking about things a lot. like every night before bed when i am trying to fall asleep! here it goes (sorry for the 'train of thought' writing, but i feel like i need to get this OUT of my head)...

is it environmental?  is it more just a genetic type of thing that is more widely known about these days than it was before, so more people are diagnosed? and more parents are worried about it being such a horrible thing when they are forgetting the positive things about children that are a little different...  of course, there are some very severe cases that are not easy to handle and i am not demeaning those cases AT ALL; i am just also trying to keep in mind that my child is not going to be treated like there is something wrong with him. he just has some differences in his development that require some extra support! but i do expect him to lead a pretty normal life :)  in our very social world we are obsessed with having to be social and connected and it is not right if you keep to yourself a little and do things on your own terms... why not? why can't someone really like something?  they probably won't like it forever; they will probably switch to something else at some point. especially those kids who have parents and other people there to support them and do lots of things with like reading lots of books, listening to different types of music, going places, trying to introduce them to new people, etc.  there are also kids who don't have as much support, but i know there are a lot more programs at schools and special needs teachers now then there were a long time ago, so hopefully they are getting some support somewhere...  there are so many people with learning differences that have gifts... they learn a different way, yes.  but they also see the world a different way; which is why we live in such an amazing place! like one of my best friends said to me when i told her about my son being diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, "albert einstein, mozart, and michelangelo were autistic... so i'm sure he'll do great things too. so many diagnoses of autism these days; there have been autistic people forever, undiagnosed.  if everyone was "normal" the world would be a boring place!"

so, i know it is a serious thing and we are doing everything we can to get him the support he needs in school and socially. he is already improving and i am glad that i have been aware of his differences at his young age.  but sometimes i worry that the label will cause problems for him.  but i just have to remind myself that the label is so that he can get the help he needs.  if i didn't do these things, he would maybe have a really hard time in school and with friends.  so doing all of this now is totally worth it. i just don't want to squash the amazing things that are happening in his brain... i do believe there is a lot going on in there! you can see it through all the things he does. 

whoa.  that is probably enough :)
peace out
lolo

so far so good...

nap schedule update!

it has worked REALLY well this week.  we are keeping our fingers crossed that the little changes on the weekend will not change the success of the new schedule!

on to other things...

the disability eligibility paperwork is IN.  i mailed in yesterday.  it felt really good to get that over with! and my friend gave me a face time lesson over the phone on how to better teach son #2 the autism therapy stuff.  it is hard to change up how you do things every day.  he is like, "why are you forcing me to do this?"  i usually just let the boys lead the way during free play; but i think it would be better for son #2 to learn how to attend better if i had it more structured...  i don't know.  i go back and forth in my head about everything ALL the time.  speech and occupational therapy have not heard from the insurance company yet about the switch to seeing son #2 at the clinic, so we are still waiting on that one too.

have you ever felt like a piece of furniture? or a jungle gym?  lately, son #2 has been crazily climbing all over me and pulling on me... it is starting to drive me a little nutty!  i am used to him grabbing my hand and leading me places that he wants to go (which i am trying to stop--trying to have him communicate... but since he doesn't really say any words, how am i supposed to have him communicate verbally?!  i need to look up picture schedules, etc... this is probably what i should do ASAP!);  but lately, he has been really pulling on my shirt, my pants, climbing on me and accidentally kicking me in the face or stomach. he doesn't seem to understand when i try to let him know that i don't like that... but if i try to talk to him about it, he doesn't even pay attention or probably know what i am talking about... so, i just don't know. how do i not give in to what he is asking for because that is the only way he knows how to do ask or have me get him something? i try to get him to say mama, but he doesn't imitate me every time.  i don't know, i guess it is a work in progress :)

we had three really fun play dates this week... these were the first since son #2 was diagnosed.  not like that would have changed anything, but i just wanted to get all the paperwork and initial feelings stuff out of the way before we had any play dates.  we had an evening play date with some besties at our house, we went to a cute play place/coffee shop in bayside, wi with a new friend that we met at son #1's swimming class, and to a park play date with some new and old friends. everyone is really nice about everything; though i don't really bring it up unless it comes up...  there are still some awkward feelings when son #2 shows little interest in other kids and tends to try to run away every 5-10 minutes... but that is just how it is i guess :)

hope everyone is having a fabulous weekend! happy earth day! (should be earth day everyday, hey?!)

:)
lolo

totally awesome.

omg.

it is day #3 of new nap schedule. and it is still working! today, i was not so sure it would work out because they woke up a little later than usual; but when i asked son #1 if he wanted to nap before school, he said, "umm, yea!" so awesome.  son #1 seems so much happier throughout the day now that he is napping again.  he used to turn into a wild monster around 4:30pm everyday without the nap. makes sense! i should have tried it earlier. but it seems that if it is his choice, he will do it... now i know.  and another super cute thing that son #1 just started doing lately is that he "reads" his bedtime stories to himself and "reads" one of them to son #2. he has got these things memorized and pretty much makes up some of his own words for the pictures on the pages. the family favorite, The Going To Bed Book, by Sandra Boynton, is the one that son #1 reads to son #2. it is pretty great. he stands up, shows him the pages and everything!

onto other things... we are still waiting on one of the evaluations for son #2 to send with all the disability eligibility paperwork. when that is here, it will all be ready to send out and then the real waiting begins! i am still trying to implement some of the ABA therapy exercises that my friend gave me-- i am just not sure if i am doing them right.  we are going to get together soon so that we can have a mock therapy session... i think the first time she came in and showed me stuff, it was a tad overwhelming... but if we did it again i think it would absorb better :)

:-)Lolo

and.... we're back!

oh hey!

so, i am trying out this new schedule for the sons... an earlier nap. since son #1 has been on spring break the past week, i had been putting him down for a nap with his brother and he had no problem with it! he was not napping for awhile before that because he goes to preschool for 2.5 hours in the afternoon, and that is when son #2 would usually nap (and mommy could get some alone time!). so, since they have been waking up earlier anyway, i thought i would see if they would sleep before son #1 goes to school... and it worked today! let's hope we can keep this up. i will let you know.

another reason why i wanted to push up the nap to an earlier time was so that i could get some quality teaching time with son #2 while son #1 is at school. i have a friend who is extremely well-versed (will have her masters degree in the field!) in ABA therapy and she is helping us try and implement some of those therapies into our daily lives until we get the funding for the intensive in-home therapy (which will be 20-30 hours a week). and it is really hard to do the exercises with both boys and just one me. it is going to take over a year for us, if approved, to get the Long Term Child Support Waiver from the state for the funding for therapy. i know, you are probably saying, "why don't you just pay for it yourself?!" well, it is crazy expensive. totally unaffordable out of pocket. and since i am home with the boys, i am dedicated to learning all that i can to help the sons keep progressing. but it is hard to change the way you do things all of the sudden; especially when you have boys that are a little bit more resistant to change. so, we will slowly change our schedule and ways of doing things so that by the time all the therapy starts (hopefully!), we will be ready for it.

i also have to say that i am SO thankful that i have so many friends that are knowledgeable about special education and autism therapies-- i would be quite lost without you guys.
 

more info :)

hey there...

so, one of the main reasons that i decided to start a blog is because my second son was recently diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder. there were developmental concerns from his pediatrician at his 18 month check-up which led to him getting evaluated by the local early intervention program. they said that he had a severe speech delay and recommended that we start speech therapy and occupational therapy once a week.

during this evaluation, i realized that my older son may have some delays too--so i went to the school district and had them evaluate him also. he also ended up having a speech delay, which they think also contributed to his social delay, and now he has an iep and goes to an early childhood program through his school district. it is an amazing program and am SO glad son #1 is in it! he has really been making big strides since he started; we are so happy that he is communicating more clearly and being able to express himself in ways he was not able to before :)

but back to son #2, we did the early intervention therapies and they seemed to be helping a lot. but i definitely had a little pit in my stomach like i should maybe do more... so, i decided to take son #2 to a neurologist and have him evaluated. i also called my pediatrician to see what she thought and she said to call the children's hospital development center and set up an appointment with them. i also decided to contact one of the local autism therapy agencies and make an evaluation appointment with them too. all of these things took a REALLY long time to get into, so if you ever have any inkling of anything being "up" with your kiddos, just get it checked out. it is better to know than to not know. anyhoo, we are still in the process with the Children's child development center (they actually referred us to the Feeding Team), but we went to the neurologist and he assured us that there is nothing medically wrong with son #2. he does not have any abnormal activity in his brain or evidence of any seizure disorders. it was difficult for them to decide if son #2 was on the spectrum since he was only 2 years old and had made improvement from appointment to appointment. they definitely believe that there are some delays, and told us to continue to do any other evals we had scheduled and keep up with the early intervention. we will see them again in the summer. then we went to the autism therapy agency and they did some of their evaluations and diagnosed son #2 with mild to moderate autism spectrum disorder.

i totally thought i was ready for that. but i totally was not.

it kind of felt like a stab in the stomach, but i have never been stabbed in the stomach, so i am not sure if it really felt like that. but i did have both boys naturally, and it definitely did not hurt as much as that! hehe. but it hurt in a different way. it is weird, you know, how with your kids, you automatically turn it around on yourself... "did i do something to make them this way?" "did i give them something?" "did i not do something?" "do i have bad genes?" but i have to keep reminding myself that i am doing things to try and make things better for them. we are getting them evaluated. we are getting them the support they need to start and get through school. we are aware of what is going on with them. and that is a good thing. right?

i kind of went through the "stab in the stomach" thing when son #1 and son #2 were both diagnosed with speech delays... did i not talk to them enough? did i let them explore things on their own too much? i thought i was doing an okay job with all that... but the autism thing was definitely a bit harder to deal with. but i gave myself a couple days to feel really bad and then i had to get my stuff together and start moving.

so, i started all the paperwork. there is so much paperwork. but it is worth it.

both boys will benefit from the things that we are learning right now. the husband and i are talking a lot and letting it all out so that we can really deal with the things we have on our plate. communication is key! i know that sounds cheesy and cliche, but it is the truth.

so, it is kind of a long post, but there is so much information. i can't do any more at this moment, i will continue on tomorrow. i hope this is not too all over the place; i am still figuring out the blogging thing :)

thanks for listening :)
lolo

hello?

hi.

so, i am a little nervous about this blogging thing. i have to tell you that i have been against it for a long time; kind of thought that it was a self-absorbed thing to do (really--no offense to anyone who has a blog, i read and subscribe to MANY!), although i am pretty positive that i have changed my mind about that... 

you know what they say about writing in a diary--it makes you feel better because you got it all out, etc. well, sometimes maybe that is not enough? like we feel like we need to actually tell somebody? and why not just put it out there for anybody and everybody, right? 

i think i like it. 

but i also have a problem with starting things and not finishing them. so, hopefully i will keep up with this one. i guess my first post will just be this. it is late and i should probably go to bed. those kiddos wake up early!